Archive for the ‘no no no no no’ Category

pressure washer / nutshot

April 9, 2013

Two big firsts this past Sunday!   After owning my own home for almost nine years, in the span of four hours I completed my two greatest achievements as a member of middle-class to date.  Specifically, I managed to:

  • Buy (and use) a pressure washer for the first time.
  • Shoot myself in the nuts with a tennis ball launched by a lawnmower that I was operating (also for the first time.)

EDIT: “also for the first time” refers to the nut-shot; not first-time using a lawnmower. (more…)

in which i decide that writing about state politics is too much for my delicate constitution

April 6, 2013

outline-31326_640This is the proposed voter-ID law for North Carolina.  The highlight (for me) was mandatory photo-ID when voting, which the voter must pay for (or swear under oath that financial hardship prevents them from doing so.)

I’ll keep it brief and say that:

  • This is obviously a functional poll tax, unconstitutional under the 24th amendment.  (You can’t require people to pay money to exercise their right to vote.)
  • This will obviously cost millions to implement, and millions more to defend in the courts
  • Taken in the best possible light, this is an attempt to fix a problem that doesn’t even exist.

(more…)

the horror! (no, really.)

March 22, 2013


“Daddy, I thought I heard a wolf…
   …then I heard a voice say ‘there’s a wolf in this room!

So says Oldest Son, appearing out of the darkness, next to my bed (at four fifteen in the morning), apparently just standing there completely motionless and waiting for me to wake up and open my eyes before he starts talking (or otherwise announcing his presence in any way.)

File under: “So scary that I made my four year-old son check my closet for monsters before sending him back to bed.”